Look, snails are just straight-up fucked up in every way. They look weird, they move at the speed of a highly-medicated old person and they leave spooge trails wherever they go (also like some highly medicated old people). However, when it comes to mating, the weirdness really stands out.
Snails are hermaphrodites and as such, have both male and female reproductive bits. Nonetheless, they still need a buddy to mate because snails, like Jesus, frown on self-love. When two of these hermaphroditic fiends get together to bump uglies, they engage in what scientists refer to as snail donkey punching.
One snail will shoot the other in the head with a "love dart," which isn't just some lame euphemism we made up, it's an actual lame euphemism commonly used to describe the weird calcified spike that Snail A uses to stab Snail B with in order to convince it to trade "small packets of sperm." Because they are both male and female, they fertilize each other then go about their merry way.
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